Tuesday, May 10, 2011

overhaul of week 7

My day trip to Rüdesheim was one of the best days of my life. I can't remember that day without smiling. It wasn't the presence of my boyfriend that made it so wonderful, although that didn't hurt matters. What made this one of the most precious days of my life was the overwhelming love from my boyfriend's Oma and Opa. That day they were my grandparents. I borrowed them but I'm not afraid to say I would have stolen them if I had to! Thankfully Christian is sweet and was willing to share.

The whole day was perfect. All of the details like the overpriced shops, the filthy pay to use bathroom, and the shop keeper who thought I was a dumb American who wouldn't argue about being ripped off (he was wrong) are just that, little details. It's been almost a year and I still feel like my chest is going to explode when I think back on that day. They were the grandparents I had always dreamed of. It didn't matter that they spoke fast Spanish and rusty German, I didn't need their words. They freely gave their love and that was something I had waited 23 years to find in a set of grandparents. I hurt my face from smiling so much. When we got home that night I collapsed on the bed and "basked." Christian was checking his email and would periodically turn around to see what I was doing. Each time he looked at me I did something spastic like kick my feet in the air while announcing, "Still basking!"

The first stop on our trip was to see Niederwalddenkmal. I am borderline possessed with German history and there isn't anything that screams Germany quite like a ten and a half meter tall monument of Germania. It is set up high overlooking gorgeous views of the Rhein but I couldn't stop staring at it. I was so enthralled that I snapped far too many pictures and then requested that Christian take pictures of me in front of it. Then, realizing that for once we had someone to take a photo of both of us, we asked Oma and Opa to take our picture with it. When Opa handed the camera back to me to check and make sure it was okay I had to laugh. He had zoomed in on our faces. I was standing with my gorgeous German in front of the symbol of Germany and he just captured our faces. That was what mattered the most to Opa. We laughed and asked for another picture and Oma tried to explain to her husband but we never got a full shot of the statue and us. Looking back I am so glad that there is the picture of us holding each other up and laughing. The monument was amazing but it paled in comparison to being young and in love.

After a very silly trip through the nearby birds of prey exhibit full of overheated and exhausted owls and hawks we headed down the hill. We all strolled the quaint little streets and gawked in the windows. Being in a country that lacked national pride was strange for me and it was heaven to finally find German souveniers.  As we walked, I held hands with Chistian and Oma and Opa held hands. I couldn't stop smiling at them and hoping that Christian and I would be like that in our 80s. I have never met a couple more in love than those two. He looked at her like she was his brand new bride.

The weather was perfect and we ate outside. Lunch was another exercise in absurdity when I tried to grab an opportunity to pay for lunch. They had been treating me to different things and I desperately wanted to pay my way. I excused myself and went inside to find our waitress. She ignored me and went outside to announce to Christian and his grandparents that she had no idea what I was talking about. The one time I had the jump on Opa and the waitress didn't speak English! I was embarrassed but everyone got a big kick out of it. After lunch had settled and we were walking around again I tried to pay for eis. I got my money to the counter at the same time Opa did but the rascal cashier took one look at me, one look at Opa, and apologized to me as he took Opa's money.

On the ride back to Frankfurt I fell asleep in the backseat. I was like a contented child after a long day in the sun. Even the Cola Lite I had filled my system with wasn't enough to keep my eyes open. I listened to them quietly chatting in Spanish and snuggled Christian and the next thing I knew they were chuckling and shaking me awake to go inside the house. I'm so blessed to have had the chance to call them mine for a month.

14 - The Neti-Chronicles

Am I really going to use something that is labeled a “nose bidet’? I’m finding this hard to believe. The specialist says it will help so I know I need to use it but I’m more than slightly alarmed by the idea. I’m not buying all of the claims that it is a pleasant or soothing sensation. I’ve been putting it off for too long though. I need to do my research and whip up a batch of salty sinus soothing sensation!

The first thing I notice is that my neti-pot isn’t the classy kind. I am too cheap to spring for the porcelain model and I’m instead going to rock out with a “free sample” version that my nose and throat doctor gave me. Although, on the plus side it doesn’t have the appearance of one model from Norway that looks like it belongs in an adult store. I’m not an expert on the topic and it may be the name of “rhino horn” that is throwing me but something just isn’t right with that one. To be honest, mine is rather boring compared to the other models. Mine isn’t even shaped in a way that is conducive to singing “I’m a little teapot” or rather, “my nose is a little teacup.” The variety of designs is astonishing. They even sell more decorative ones for when you apparently need your sinus cleaner to make a fashion statement.

I learned something terrifying in my studies. Oprah recommends it. In my opinion, anything Oprah recommends is either painful or depressing. Or, if you’ve ever read something from her book club: both. Why does Oprah need something to wash out her sinuses? Can’t she employ an army of little people to hose down the old nose each night? I’m a do it yourself kind of girl though. I’m also afraid I’ll now be having nightmares about oomph-loompas coming at my nose with garden hoses. Great.

I found the videos about neti-pots more hilarious than informative. I’m also noticing a strong connection between mullets and the neti-pot. I wonder if I will have to get a new hairdo if I start using this thing on a regular basis? I have to say that it is already helping me. They say laughter is the best medicine and I haven’t laughed as hard as I did during mustache-man’s infomercial in a long time. I now know that I can talk while I am cleansing my nose. After how many years of marriage does that become something you are comfortable doing? My Mum is insisting on supervising me the first time I use it but that’s due to the fact that she’s afraid I’ll manage to drown myself due to my abnormal sinus situation. She loves me no matter what anyway. I like to take my prosthesis out every now and then and yell, “Ma, get my teeth!” just for kicks. I feel that most people probably don’t have that same kind of bond and I’m a little disturbed that he felt the need to reassure me that I can continue my normal conversation. I’m also more than a bit disturbed by the disclaimer that it is nothing like waterboarding torture. That's good to know because I was worried!

All kidding aside I have learned a lot about sinus cleansing. I hope that it is as life-changing as all of these testimonials claim. Ireland was the only relief I have had in my chronic sinus infections since I had my surgeries. A container filled with salt water is slightly cheaper. Speaking of costs, I’m extremely relieved to see that you can mix your own solution. I need to pick up non-iodized salt tomorrow. The general consensus is that ¼ of a teaspoon per 8 ounces of warm water is all I need. Why do people pay for already measured packets? That’s a new level of lazy.

I’m truly amazed by how popular these things are. I find it rather maddening that it wasn’t suggested that I try one before! There are actual blogs devoted entirely to talking about neti-pots and sinus cleansing! And if that wasn’t amazing enough, I have discovered that several entire books were written on the subject. I’m in awe of this phenomenon. It’s used for allergies and most sites talk a lot about how it helps the cilia function but that is useless to me. I have a “damaged mucociliary transport system.” Basically, my body isn’t doing the job so I need to do it manually. I don’t even have the cilia that they are so enthralled with discussing.

I feel a little bit intimidated that it is linked to Ayurveda because I studied a lot of Ayurvedic techniques when I was considering an apprenticeship as a massage therapist. I was a bit turned off of the idea when I read so many completely off the wall and sometimes dangerous treatments. But, I’m all about alternative medicine if it will actually work and I continue to experiment with anything from licorice pills for IBS (all I can say: ouch!) to fish oil for my dry eyes (works brilliantly and I no longer have “plugs”). Anything that will keep me from needing so many antibiotics would be a wonderful thing. Sinus irrigation is a lot simpler than I had imagined. It is also a lot more popular. Now, if all the kids were jumping off a bridge I wouldn’t jump too but snorting water? That I’ll do!

Monday, May 9, 2011

13

Vier Minuten

I started this movie expecting to hate it. I had read a review that said something along the lines of “this movie is not a movie to enjoy, just watch.” Well, that didn’t sound appealing to me. I’ve watched too many movies that in my opinion, people just pretend  to “get.” I was afraid this would be one of those overly pretentious movies that people say you “should watch“ that leave me wanting to bang my head against a wall. I don’t understand the concept of not enjoying a movie if it is a quality movie. And if I don’t get something, I say so. Vier Minuten wasn’t at all like I was expecting. Bleibtreu and Herzsprung were phenomenal. The emotions didn’t feel forced. This movie has so much raw emotion and they handle it well. I’m anxious to watch more movies with these incredible actresses. I was completely drawn in. It is a very dark and emotional movie and is certainly a far cry from standard movies these days. I watched it over a month ago and it is still fluttering through my mind. The characters were frustrating and complex but somehow I wanted Jenny to have her sense of accomplishment. Jenny’s self-destruction was painful and the layers of why each woman became who they are both shed light on and confused the picture. Nobody was perfect. There were no “good characters” or “bad characters.” I didn’t feel like the movie was spoon feeding me how I should feel about them. Too many modern movies have no faith in the viewers and spell everything out to us. This was the highest quality “new” movie that I have watched in a long time. The good and the bad were jumbled together and complicated like they are in real life. This is the most cryptic review I’ve ever done but discussing the specific pieces would ruin part of the movie’s appeal, I think. As I’m reflecting on what to say about this movie I realize that removing pieces from this movie would be like taking pieces out of a puzzle. It doesn’t have the same effect. It manages to be frantic but slow and dark but hopeful. It is a whirlwind movie experience. I love that everyone will walk away with this movie with a different impression. Everyone will extract different parts that replay in their minds. I think that this is the first recently made “movie that makes you think” type of movie that I have enjoyed in a very long time. I credit that fact to their faith in their work. They let the movie lead you wherever it is you might go. They don’t tell you or push any specific idea on you.

And the last “vier minuten” or rather, four minutes?
Absolutely breathtaking.

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

12

If you asked me to find a symbol of my childhood I would hand you a copy of a well-worn, taped together, yellowing “Little House in the Big Woods.” The entire series is on the shelf in the library at my parent’s house but this was the book that started it all. It says $3.50 in the top left-hand  corner but this book is worth so much to me.

My Mother first read the book to me and my brother when I was too little to make a lot of sense out of what was being read. We loved being read to and these were her favorite books as a child as well. The first memories I have of this book and of my life are simply of cuddling with my Mum and brother. I enjoyed hearing my Mum read and the simple joy of being together with my family as we read about another family. A family from 1870 and beyond came to life in our house in 1980 and beyond.

The constant sibling fights and my brother’s endless need to pick at me to make me squawk became suspended while we listened to my Mother’s voice. We begged her to read the books constantly. A few years later, after the first reading through of the books I requested that she read them to me again. My brother sat through the entire re-reading of the series. By the time she read the books through again I was ready to start at the beginning and read them myself! I have no idea how many times I read these pages or listened to my Mum bring the words to life. Sometimes we would all be under the covers at night but my favorite times were when we sat in the living room by our own woodstove. I could imagine myself being Laura that much easier with the setting of the fire in front of me. I was a farm girl and Laura Ingalls Wilder was my hero. The way the Laura is staring lovingly down at the doll in her arms on the cover of the book is exactly the way I must look gazing down at the book in my lap today.

I have set the scene for myself again.  I’ve built a fire in the fireplace and I’m snuggled in a pile of blankets to revisit why I fell in love with these books over and over. This “Once upon a time….” was the beginning of my lifelong love affair with books. Each one of the thousands of books I have picked up in the 20 years since I first heard about Laura and her sister Mary is due to the magic I found within these pages. In a way everything I have read since the Little House books has been an attempt to find the love I had for this series.

I remember so much of the books even though it has been years since I read them. I remember being horrified by them being excited on slaughtering day because they would get a pig tail and Pa would blow up the pig’s bladder for them to use as a ball. That was a lesson for me and my brother… children happy to have a blown up bladder to play with. I remember pretending to be them as they played in their attic in the winter months surrounded by the food that was being stored for the winter. I vaguely recall begging my father to grow big pumpkins so I could sit on them like tables and chairs like Laura and Mary did. If I sit and think about it so much of their stories come back to me. They are beautifully written and all the more engaging for children when you talk about how this was the author’s childhood. She had not only an interesting story to tell but knew how to tell it. Clearly Laura inherited Pa’s gift for telling stories. Opening any page pulls up how she creates vivid images with her words, “They were cosy and comfortable in their little house made of logs, with the snow drifted around it and the wind crying because it could not get in by the fire.”

Someday, when I am blessed with a family of my own I will start reading the series to them. Since my own children are many years in the future I will content myself with reading them to other peoples children. This summer I have the pleasure of fulltime care of an eight year old farm girl. She’s not hooked on books yet but my plan is to read the series to her over the summer and see where it takes us. I have a feeling she will fall in love. I certainly fell in love with Little House in the Big Woods. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have some reading to do.